Saturday, September 17, 2005

Roller Derby Semis


Best. Bout. Ever.

Tonight, the Roller Girls faced off in their first playoff games. As I predicted, the DLF v. Sockit Wenches matchup was intense, and the Throttle Rockets v. Grave Danger was a bit of a snoozer. The new venue (Hangar 27 @ Sandpoint) was outstanding. It is a HUGE hangar, at least twice the size of the last one, and the larger space and more distant walls definitely improve the audio. The best new feautre is the beer garden seating!

The first bout was low scoring, violent and tense. The DLF came out short-handed, with a number of injuries and a conspicuously absent Kim Reaper (where are you Kim?). Lorna Boom was apparently recovering from a serious car accident, and was supposed to see limited duty, but she was out there in most jams, filling in for the fallen. From the beginning, the Sockit Wenches had more energy, more drive, and better strategy. Surprisingly enough, it was not Miss Fortune, the Sockit Wenches' heart and soul, but Pia Mess who gave the DLF fits. With most of their good jammers injured or absent, the DLF turned to Burnett Down (pictured above--courtesy of joygantic) to jam for them every other jam. She did a remarkable job after a shaky start, but at the half, it was within 2 points. Everyone wondered if DLF had enough in the tank to win. To make matters worse, DLF had more players go down in the second half--Momma Cherry left with an injury along with Punchin' Judy. Both would return, but DLF played all night long as the skating wounded.

It was tied @ 36 all with 3:00 to go, when the DLF pulled off a number of smart moves. They may have been tired, but they executed some strategic coups and strong individual efforts. First, underrated jammer Hideous Braxley skated through the pack, became lead jammer, and scored 4 quick points. She wisely called off the jam before the Sockit Wenches could score any points. Then, Burnett Down faced off against Sockit Wenches ace jammer Miss Fortune, and absolutely leveled her at the start of the jam. I haven't seen a hit like that since Lawerence Talyor knocked out Joe Montana. With the lead secured, DLF went on defense, inserting Diva State and Kitty Kamikase at blocker. Getting past these two tall, powerful ladies is nearly impossible, and with Pia Mess and Miss Fortune on the bench exhausted, it fell to poor Juliet Bravo to try and salvage the game. She could not get past the wall. Hideous Braxely scored a few extra points, while Juliet went down hard, injuring her elbow, and trying valiantly to skate the last few seconds in a losing cause. I have to wonder why Pia Mess was not out there for the last jam. With 1:15 left in your season, why not have your best jammer out there?

In the end, Burnett Down, who had jammed for the DLF nearly half of the jams, still seemed like a bundle of energy--Juliet Bravo, on the other hand, sat on the ground, holding her elbow, comforted by her teammates. The Sockit Wenches almost pulled off the massive upset, but they fell just short 45-36 (it was closer than it sounds). The MVP of the world has to go to Burnett Down. She carried her team, and seemed to get stonger as the match went on. When she JACKED Miss Fortune (and you really had to see it to believe it) , she not only stopped the Sockit Wenches' momentum, she took the heart out of them. This is the second or third time this season that the DLF needed Burnett Down to come up with a great jam to put them comfortably ahead. She can singlehandedly change the game like no one else. She's not the biggest, or the fastest rollergirl out there (although she'd be in the top 5 in both categories), but she's a big game player with an attitude a mile wide. Go DLF!

DLF will face the Throttle Rockets in the finals. TR got there with their usual combination of strength and speed. Darth Skater and Valtron 3000 were their usual dominant selves, but, surprisingly, most of the points were scored by Astroglide. Femme Fatale did play for Grave Danger, but she is shaping up as the Barry Sanders of the Roller Derby world, a great player who's incredibly fun to watch on a mediocre team. Also, inexplicably, they used her at pivot for most of the game, not jammer. She is a good pivot, but she's too small to have much effect on the taller, stronger girls who try to pass her. She laid a great hit on Darth Skater at one point, and pretty much bounced off. It would have been closer if they had used her as jammer as often as the DLF did with Burnett Down, but I think the outcome would have been the same.

The finals will be epic. The DLF beat the Throttle Rockets pretty soundly in their last meeting, but you can throw that result out the window. If the DLF doesn't have Kim Reaper back , they may not have the offense to win. The Throttle Rockets have a strong cast of interchangable jammers who can all score, and they're bigger and stronger than the Sockit Wenches, so they should match up better with the DLF. The matchup that I most want to see, of course, is Darth Skater v. Burnett Down. They're both outstanding, but Darth's fast, tough, and low to the ground, while Burnett's tall, unhittable, and cagey. The Throttle Rockets apparently wanted to see this too, when the Sockit Wenches tied the DLF late, the Throttle Rockets stood up and chanted "D-L-F." I guess your season isn't complete until you've beaten the best. Now they'll get a chance.

The finals will be CRAZY! Mark your calendars now. October 15th.

29 comments:

mark said...

Thank you for the awesome detailed recap! I'll definitely be at the finals. I heard Jinx had to go to the hospital. What happend to her?

Tin Foil Hat said...

Mark, She took a nasty spill and a blow to the head, but she is, thankfully ok. See:

http://www.ratcityrollergirls.com/bb/viewtopic.php?t=4457

SJ said...

Burnett Down really did "JACK" Miss Fortune. What got me was that she did it almost nonchalantly: a flick of the elbow without even looking at Miss Fortune as she passed her, and that woman hit the track HARD. But Miss Fortune almost had it coming. She spent the warm up period pulling at Burnett’s pigtails and her little ruffle shorts. More than worth admission, all of it!

Tin Foil Hat said...

Yes, I forgot to mention the pre-game and in-game taunting. As SJ mentions, Miss Fortune spent most of the warm-ups skating up to Burnett Down trash-talking and hair pulling. She definitely had it coming.

For some examples of pregame taunting, look here:

http://www.ratcityrollergirls.com/bb/viewforum.php?f=53&sid=2e1aed9ffc573517deffc3dd6f24f8b1

Llarian said...

GD came back to within 5 points of TR at the end of the game without showing much sign of slowing down. I'm not sure if I'd call that mediocre or a snoozer. They typically have a stronger second half presence.

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't call GD mediocre or any of the RCRG teams for that matter. Those girls work their butts off for each bout. GD is also the smallest team in the league, so I personally think that they have to work a bit harder than the rest of teams.

All around a good show. I'll be sad when the season is over.

Meredith said...

Awesome recap. I'm glad to hear you enjoy the DLF vs. SW match-up -- it was certainly a close match from our perspective as well.

You did forget to mention one of our other injuries: Mae C. Stars dislocated her thumb in the first half and came back in the second half to bout some more, all bandaged up! She's a tough cookie.

See you at the finals!

(-Kitty Kamikaze)

Anonymous said...

Heh-heh. Two things: One, matches aren't won or lost exclusively by the jammers... and two, even the teensiest member of Grave Danger could mop the floor with you. These ladies are carved out of freaking rock -- there's not a goddamn thing about them that's "mediocre," save the quality of the sports writing they've attracted thus far.

Stick to politics, son. You're quite literally out of your league.

Anonymous said...

wow, someone got thier panties in a bunch!

Tin Foil Hat said...

Believe me, I know that any one of the Roller Girls could kick my ass. :) They wouldn't even break a sweat.

No disrepect intended to Grave Danger. I write about the Rat City Roller Girls because I LOVE them all. It just seems to me, that GD didn't have the right stuff this year to win it all. In my opinion, they lack size (as another commenter also pointed out) and consistency, not heart or effort. They have both of these in abundance.

(As a side note, please don't kill me!)

I didn't write about the injuries to Mae C. or Jinx (mostly b/c I didn't know the extent of them), but Kitty's right, these roller girls are tough cookies. Get well Jinx and Mae C.

See you at the finals!

L&D said...

I think it's great that you're getting hate mail, just like every other sports writer out there. Have you ever listened to a sports talk show? People come unglued. I think this means you've made the big time.

Tin Foil Hat said...

L&D, yes, but we're not talking about some run-of-the-mill NFL player or 7 foot tall basketball player. We're talking about Rollergirls. I'm much more afraid of them :)

Seriously, I'm sorry you're missing the Rollergirl action. Sara should start a team in Denmark.

Cat said...

It seems that the bouts are more exciting each time around. I heard a rumor that DLF threatened to forfeit if the Sockit Wenches didn't take Robin YO Life out of the game due to high scoring against DLF. I'm not sure how accurate this rumor is, but I'd like to hear how accurate that is.

Lorna Boom said...

Like all rumors there is an element of truth. DLF did threaten to forfeit the game, not because of high scoring (DLF was actually ahead when the forfeiture conversation came about) but because of illegal blocking that was resulting in further injuries to DLF skaters.

Kim Reaper said...

Thanks for the compliment! I was in NYC for a wedding, but I will definitely be there at the championship!

Anonymous said...

http://forum.webhostlist.de/forum/members/newviagra.html
[b]VIAGRA alternatives VIAGRA BILLIG BESTELLEN[/b]
lhttp://www.ile-maurice.com/forum/members/newviagra.html
[b]VIAGRA online BESTELLEN PREISVERGLECH VIAGRA BILLIG[/b]
VIAGRA BESTELLEN eur 0.85 Pro Pille >> Klicken Sie Hier << BESTELLEN BILLIG VIAGRA CIALIS VIAGRA Holland REZEPTFREI VIAGRA KAUFEN
http://www.flooringchat.com/member.php?u=19861
[b]VIAGRA online BESTELLEN PREISVERGLECH VIAGRA BESTELLEN[/b]
[url=http://www.getsomeskillz.co.uk/forum/member.php?u=13]BILLIG[/url] - VIAGRA
[b]VIAGRA preis BESTELLEN BILLIG VIAGRA[/b]
[b]VIAGRA alternativ VIAGRA BESTELLEN PREISVERGLECH[/b]
[url=http://cafesuoimo.com/member.php?u=8]erection VIAGRA[/url] - VIAGRA bestellen
[b]VIAGRA Austria VIAGRA REZEPTFREI PREISVERGLECH[/b]
[b]VIAGRA online kaufen VIAGRA REZEPTFREI BILLIG[/b]

Anonymous said...

[b]alternativ zu VIAGRA VIAGRA BESTELLEN[/b]
http://www.getsomeskillz.co.uk/forum/member.php?u=13
[b]VIAGRA Deutschland BILLIG VIAGRA REZEPTFREI BESTELLEN[/b]
VIAGRA BESTELLEN eur 0.85 Pro Pille >> Klicken Sie Hier << BESTELLEN BILLIG VIAGRA CIALIS VIAGRA alternativ Viagra im Internet Kaufen
http://cafesuoimo.com/member.php?u=8
[b]VIAGRA ohne rezept VIAGRA BILLIG PREISVERGLECH[/b]
[url=http://www.barroco.comyr.com/member.php?u=3]VIAGRA Apotheke[/url] - alternativ zu VIAGRA
[b]VIAGRA Oesterreich VIAGRA REZEPTFREI BILLIG[/b]
[b]erection VIAGRA VIAGRA BILLIG PREISVERGLECH BESTELLEN[/b]
[url=http://www.noise-unltd.com/member.php?u=2 ]VIAGRA online kaufen[/url] - VIAGRA online bestellen
[b]VIAGRA Suisse PREISVERGLECH VIAGRA BILLIG[/b]
[b]VIAGRA Oesterreich VIAGRA PREISVERGLECH BESTELLEN[/b]

Anonymous said...

http://www.djmal.net/thaspot/members/viagrakaufend
[b]VIAGRA online BESTELLEN VIAGRA PREISVERGLECH REZEPTFREI[/b]
http://www.serataanime.it/forum2/member.php?u=336
[b]VIAGRA Apotheke VIAGRA[/b]
VIAGRA BESTELLEN eur 0.85 Pro Pille >> Klicken Sie Hier << BESTELLEN BILLIG VIAGRA CIALIS VIAGRA on line VIAGRA REZEPTFREI BESTELLEN
http://www.barroco.comyr.com/member.php?u=3
[b]VIAGRA information VIAGRA PREISVERGLECH[/b]
[url=http://www.einvestorhelp.com/member.php?u=37776]VIAGRA online kaufen[/url] - FREE VIAGRA
[b]VIAGRA erection BILLIG VIAGRA PREISVERGLECH BESTELLEN[/b]
[b]PFIZER VIAGRA VIAGRA[/b]
[url=http://www.zonatuning.com/members/viagrakaufend]VIAGRA Austria[/url] - VIAGRA ohne rezept
[b]VIAGRA alternatives PREISVERGLECH VIAGRA[/b]
[b]VIAGRA im internet kaufen VIAGRA BESTELLEN[/b]
[b]VIAGRA® kaufen
VIAGRA Deutschland
VIAGRA online kaufen
VIAGRA on line
VIAGRA alternativ
VIAGRA rezeptfrei
VIAGRA Kaufen
VIAGRA Apotheke[/b]

invierta en proyectos said...

hello fellas, I just want to emphasize the good work on this blog, has excellent views and a clear vision of what you are looking for.

Franco Luis said...

was that she did it almost nonchalantly: a flick of the elbow without even looking at Miss Fortune as she passed her, and that woman hit the track HARD. But Miss Fortune almost had it coming. She spent the warm up period pulling at Burnett’s pigtails and her little ruffle shorts. More than worth admission, all of it! skill games

Jonathon said...

I read your post and it was great. I am share this story in my facebook and twitter
-how to stop premature ejaculation thanks

Henry said...

I read your post and it was great. Now i am going to introduce maglia calcio as a new fashion in magliette nerd marketing. You can also take a look on magliette cinem. Which is for up-coming fashion related design

bay area bankruptcy lawyers said...

Really nice article and by reading this article i learned somethings.To know about bay area bankruptcy lawyers please visit our site.

kitchen aide mixer said...

Thanks for posting this detailed information. Best of luck.

Bosch mixer said...

Wow! it is a wonderful description about the recap. Really happy to know that you enjoyed the DLF.

Carbon fiber hoods said...

Really nice topic to talk about.Would like to bookmark this page.Really enjoyed the discussion.

Khanh Tran said...

Hi, I have read your post and it is just amazing. Keep it up. Great job. ab machines

prince0 said...

This is awesome work. I have read the article and it seems to me very innovative indeed.
Want to really see some more update here. Keep it up man.You made some good points there.
I did a search on the topic and found most people will agree with your blog. Thanks
Natural beauty

Jannatul Ferdus said...

Your blog is really excellent. It inspires the readers who have that great desire to lead a better and happier life. Thanks for sharing this information and hope to read more from you. Great information… infocera